Sunday, December 23, 2007

Southern-All Star Wrestling TV Report- Episode 25

Opening with highlight clips from last week…Arrick Andrews pinned A.M. Vision to advance to the Television Tournament Final against Nore Havoc…Havoc (with Paul Adams) interrupted Andrews’ interview segment. “Now, you’ve got a shot, a teeny one, but a shot to face Nore Havoc for this TV Title.” Andrews wasn't backing down, and their heated confrontation verged on getting physical.

Cut to Jack Johnson and Hot Rod Biggs at ringside in their Christmas hats. Biggs hyped the Andrews/Havoc title match as today’s main event. SAW starts NOW!

(1) Mason Raige beat “Big” Rig Brown via submission in 6:55. A showcase for Raige’s strength and power. Brown (formerly Kliff Hanger) is billing himself as the best truck driver in the world. Johnson questioned just how that was determined. Brown’s gear, with the giant K on the jersey, must be leftovers from the previous gimmick. Rig didn’t look very big next to Raige, who goes about 6-3 and 260. Raige finished Brown with his version of the torture rack called “The Rack of Raige.”

Over at the desk. Johnson asked Raige for his thoughts on the tournament. Raige said Havoc pinned him in the semis by using the tights but he wasn’t going to complain about it. Raige was going with Andrews, but whoever won was going to have to deal with “The Modern Man of Steel.”

They cut to comments from Rick Santel, who said Andrews was also his pick to win.

As Homicidal Tendencies strutted out to the desk. Johnson reminded the fans that Tendencies held four belts (SAW and NWA Top Rope tag titles). Kory Williams said the tag team scene in SAW had turned pathetic since Tendencies got rid of the Naturals and Maddox Brothers. Williams said things were so bad Brother Vic had to beat up on an Injun, (Lennox Lighfoot.) Williams called him “Lightfoots.”

I gotta go beat up on somebody. Why should Vic have all the fun? Hey, I almost didn’t recognize him (Lightfoots) without the casino t-shirt on.

Williams and Bruiser made a fool out of Johnson by rearranging his Santa hat.

(2) Lennox Lightfoot beat Kory Williams (with Vic the Bruiser) in 6:18. Williams did mock tomahawk chops and motioned that Lightfoot was drinking firewater. Johnson was suspicious about Bruiser’s presence at ringside. Biggs said being on the road together 330 days a year made them tag team brothers, so Johnson was jumping to conclusions. The “brothers” each took a dropkick from Lightfoot. Williams fired chops. Johnson said those were called the Pork Chops. Lightfoot reversed and lit Williams up. Bruiser interfered and Williams knocked Lighfoot out of the ring with a knee in the back. Bruiser beat up on Lightfoot, while referee Kurt Herron was admonishing Williams. Back inside the ring, Lightfoot ducked Wiliams’ lariats and got the upset win with a flying crucifix. Tendencies gave Lightfoot a postmatch beating. Bruiser hit a Samoan drop into a hangman’s neckbreaker. Tendencies proceeded to rub makeup all over Lightfoot’s face. Williams grabbed Lightfoot’s Indian war bonnet.

Each one of those feathers means something, and now “Hot Chocolate” Kory Williams is just ripping them up and throwing them everywhere. This is crazy.

Indian Outlaw hit the ring for the save. Wiliams said Lightfoot was an imposter because he didn’t paint himself up, so Tendencies did it for him.

“The Graduate” Jason James predicted that Havoc would defeat Andrews.

(3) A. M. Vision beat T. J. Harley in 5:45. Vision attacked at the opening bell. Harley came back with the Pounce. Harley had him in trouble, until Vision shoved Harley into the turnbuckles and laced him with an enzuigiri. There was a screwy spot where it looked like Harley wanted to slingshot to the inside, and Vision surprised him with a wicked slingshot stomp to the outside. Vision showed off his moveset. Biggs said they were cutting to more predictions on the Havoc/Andrews match. Silence. Harley kicked out of what Biggs called the best top rope elbow he had ever seen. Where do you go from there? Frogsplash and Harley kick out again. Vision’s offensive barrage left Harley face down on the mat. Vision used Jericho’s Codebreaker. But Harley countered the Infamy with a side backbreaker, and it was both men down. Harley hit a helluva push up powerbomb. Pin attempt by Vision, reversed by Harley, reversed by Vision 1..2..3.

“Boogie Woogie Boy” Gary Valiant was Biggs’ special guest on “Shop Talk.” Biggs wondered how Boogie was doing after being put out of action by Hammerjack’s piledriver. “The doctors hasn’t released me.” Boogie was slurring his words. Valiant said he was tired of being jumped from behind, and last time, Hammerjack put him through a table while Charming Charles made Miss Boogie watch. Biggs said it was absolutely disgusting, and brought up the time Valiant’s trips to Skyline Medical Center. Valiant said the second time, he thought he was out wrestling for good.

Like his saying goes, don’t turn your back on Hammerjack. You know, I got that firsthand…I’m astin Hammerjack, right now. Hammer., I’m astin you for a match. The biggest card that’s ever came to Columbia, Tennessee. Hammerjack, sign it. cuz I will be there, if I have to STEAL, BORROW, BEG, or if I have to hitchhike to Columbia. Be there.

Cut to Johnson with Hammerjack and Charles. “You guys have got so many chains it’s unbelievable.” Charles offered to give Valiant a Christmas Chain Match on December 25 in Columbia.

Chain match, my brother. You remember the classic Charles Dickens, “A Christmas Carol?” Remember Ebenezer Scrooge, the ghost of Christmas past, locked in chains for the sins he had committed? Well, Gary Valiant, you are going to be locked that night in chains for the sins you’ve committed. You are going to be drug from corner to corner to corner in these chains, Gary. And you have got to agree to our terms. If you walk out of this, which you won’t, (giggles like a crazy man) you are going to be mangled. You are going to be unmercifully beat. So Christmas Night, Columbia, Tennessee, National Guard Armory. We’d love to see you, Gary.

Next up was a series of clips explaining the 6 month history leading to Andrews/Havoc…June 16 – After a fake display of good sportsmanship, Chris Michaels attacked Andrews’ injured hamstring, but Andrews managed to roll Michaels up for the flash pin…July 14 – Andrews interrupts Havoc’s interview time. Havoc warns Andrews to NEVER turn his back on him again. Havoc back jumps Andrews during his match. Michaels and Havoc shave Andrews’ head…August 4 – Andrews chases Havoc with a stick and accidentally shoves it into the throat of Commissioner Freddie Morton. August 11 – Andrews fined $10K and suspended for 21 days by Morton. Last week – Andrews reaches the finals and refuses to bow down to the mighty Havoc.

(4) Arrick Andrews beat Nore Havoc (with Paul Adams) to win the SAW Television Title Tournament in 10:20. Biggs said Havoc had been his pick from day one. Biggs announced James Storm vs. Chris Michaels for Christmas night in Columbia. Andrews throttled Havoc with straight wrestling. There was a totally illogical spot where Havoc turned his back to talk to the referee Kurt Herron and got nailed. Johnson said Havoc had lost his marbles. The match did a 180 when Havoc pulled the top rope down. While Adams distracted Herron, Havoc worked Andrews over at ringside. Johnson complained about Adams. Biggs said Johnson was biased. Johnson told Biggs he was going to get coal in his stocking, among other things. A shaky looking spin-around bulldog started the comeback. But it was all good from there. Havoc kicked out of a reverse rolling cradle, and Andrews blasted Adams, who was on the apron ready to interfere. Adams bumped to the floor. Havoc schoolboyed Andrews using the tights for a close near fall. Havoc tried for the Chopping Block (RKO), but Andrews blocked. Adams grabbed Andrews by the leg. Andrews yanked Adams up to apron. Andrews ducked, and Adams got clocked by Havoc. Andrews nailed a disbelieving Havoc with the Dragon’s Curse.

Shameless plug…

Christmas Night at the National Guard Armory in Columbia, Tennessee with an 8:01 belltime.

Christmas Chain Match : “Boogie Woogie Boy” Gary Valiant vs. Hammerjack (with Charming Charles).

2 out of 3 fall for the SAW TV Title: Arrick Andrews(c) vs. A. M. Vision.

“Cowboy” James Storm, Chris Michaels, Homicidal Tendencies, Tribal Nation.

Closing Thoughts: Charles cut a money promo, primo stuff, straight from the heyday of the territories, the type that is sadly becoming a lost art in today’s wrestling. If you can’t appreciate stuff like Valiant murdering the English language, the politically incorrect comedy of Tendencies vs. Tribal Nation, and the ridiculousness of an indie wrestler getting fined 10K, then this is probably not the show for you. Some of Johnson’s comments had me laughing out loud. Biggs still has heelish leanings on color, but he took a major step in coming out as a babyface. I was at the live taping. Vision/Harley came across to me much better match on TV, particularly Harley’s selling like he was nearly dead before making the come back. Raige also made a better impression on TV. He’s green but pushable, and needs to be brought along slowly. They did an excellent job of making a big deal out of the title match with the comments from other wrestlers and the clips to explain the story. The jump cuts cameras were much smoother this week. There was only the one obvious technical glitch. There are times when they do themselves no favors with the camera angle, like the cringeworthy close up of Bruiser barely touching Lightfoot. Good heat for the title match with the crowd heavily into Andrews. His ring work was was nothing special. With that said, good booking can cover a multitude of sins, and this story was an all out push for Andrews as top babyface. He goes over the guy that shaved his head for the title, and overcomes outside interference to get a clean pin with his finisher.